Feeling proud this pride to be a WMA student from the LGBT+ community!

By Ross Golightly

I’m pleased to write this blog to help increase awareness of the importance of ensuring people within the LGBT+ community feel able to access sport opportunities. To some it might seem like they’re no barriers or challenges in this, however research commissioned by LGBT+ organisation Stonewall found that 1 in 4 LGBT+ people don’t feel welcome in sports groups, with 1 in 5 attending fitness clubs or sports groups experiencing discrimination because of their LGBT+ identity (If you’re interested in finding out more, the research can be found here). With these findings in mind I wanted to write a little about my experience with sports, and joining WMA as a gay man. 

Sport and Sexuality: A Difficult Start

I don’t think this will be a surprise to some of you who know me from WMA, but I was not a particularly sporty child. I hated sports, I was one of a few boys in my year almost always picked last for team sports at PE, and if I could do anything to get out of engaging in PE, I would. Forgetting kit, fake sick notes, the lot! While I put some of my negative feelings towards PE to being unfit (you’ll know I often must run to my inhaler after a few short rounds of sparring!), deep down I knew I was just different to the other boys in class. Thinking back as an adult and now writing this blog, some of my anxieties around sports were probably to do with being gay, worried kids would call me gay because I showed no interest in playing football and didn’t play good enough like the rest of them. Of course this is not to say that all LGBT+ people hate and avoid sports, but it was my personal lived experience. 

First Steps into Taekwon-Do

At some point during secondary school I joined a Taekwon-Do club, I can’t remember fully how it came about. I went with my next-door neighbour who is just 3 weeks younger than me, I think he had heard about the classes and asked me to join him, so I did. While I certainly struggled with the fitness element of the sport, I did enjoy it, especially the patterns. Unfortunately I stopped going after a year and didn’t pick up anything else in its place. 

Following the Tokyo Olympics in 2021 I was inspired to do some sort of sport, it came down to Taekwon-Do and Archery! I saw that WMA was close and had an upcoming trial, so I decided to go along. It had been almost twenty years since I last had a Taekwon-Do lesson. I remember feeling anxious about my first class, but this quickly went away, and after the trial finished I knew I wanted to continue classes, and almost four years later I’m still going. 

Coming Out Is Constant

Coming out can be a lifelong experience for some, every time you’re introduced to a new person, start a new job, or join a club, at some point you may feel you have to come out.

For example if people new in your life get to know you, they may ask personal questions, “Are you married?” “Yeah”, “What’s your wife’s name?” or “How did you meet you wife?” etc. Lying at this point puts you back hiding in the closet, so you make a choice, for me it’s “His name is…”. There’s always that hesitation in the back of your mind as you don’t know how the other person will react, will they give you a certain look, or say something? For some people coming out can sadly be a negative experience, even dangerous. Fortunately I’ve been very lucky with those in my life that I’ve told, and this includes everyone at WMA where it’s never been a difficult conversation, and I proudly talk openly about my partner when the opportunity arises in conversation with instructors of students such as telling them how he helps me practice my theory for gradings. 

Living the Tenets of Taekwon-Do

At the beginning of every class the Taekwon-Do oath is recited by all students, the first tenet is courtesy (Ye Ui), simply put this means being polite, and respectful to others. As such if people reciting this genuinely apply this tenet within the dojang then nobody should have any reason to feel unsafe or unwelcome in the class. I know wholeheartedly that if I was ever subject to any kind of homophobia that I could report this. Miss Gleaves takes safeguarding, and associated policies and procedures at the club very seriously. I am certain that if I or any other student felt unsafe for whatever reason we could raise this. 

Overall I love attending WMA and have been attending TKD classes as well as the weekly stretch and strengthen sessions for almost four years now. Within that time I have always felt safe, and welcome. WMA embodies a positive, friendly culture. Anyone need only look at photos and videos of the classes on social media to see the students having fun and achieving their goals. 

To anyone from the LGBT+ community anxious about starting a martial art or another sport, I know that feeling, as do many others, so it’s totally valid with literal research to back this up. While some sports have separate LGBT+ friendly teams such as LGBT+ rugby, many others will not. For a club you’re considering joining, and you want to gauge how LGBT+ friendly the club is, explore the social media platforms, maybe they’ve posted something about Pride and their inclusivity, maybe they have a safeguarding policy which details how they manage safeguarding concerns such as bullying. For clubs like WMA, who facilitate trials, maybe attend a trial, and if its not for you then you don’t have to return. Something out there will be right for you! 

To anyone specifically thinking about joining WMA, I would totally recommend this, you’ll be made to feel welcome, and everyone is treated the same.